Im a mask to the world

Monday, September 17, 2007

7:08 PM; unforgotten.Y

Sunday, September 16, 2007

Today was the feast day in church.

Was nice...lots of singing and dancing and food.

I even saw Mr Teo selling chicken rice.. LOL

Halfway, Brenda, Tang, Bryan, Greg, Mat Ben and i went to starbucks to chill for a while.

Then Mat Ben went home and Cass came.

Then...the guys went home and us girls went for undergarments shopping.

And this song sang by someone from church today is still stuck in my head....

Stand By Me - Song Lyrics

As performed by Ben E. KingA

# 1 R&B and # 4 Top 40 hit from 1961

Re-released in 1986 for the movie of the same name and hit # 9 on the Top 40 charts

An excellent first dance song at weddings

When the night has come

And the land is dark

And the moon is the only light we'll see

No, I won't be afraid,

No, I won't be afraid

Just as long as you stand,

Stand by me.

So darling darling, stand by me, oh, stand by me,

Oh, stand, stand by me, stand by me.

If the sky that we look upon

Should tumble and fall

Or the Mountain should crumble in the sea,

I won't cry,

No I won't shed a tear.

Just as long as you stand, stand by me.

So ,darling, darling, stand by me, oh, stand by me

Oh, stand, stand by me, stand by me.

7:55 PM; unforgotten.Y

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

I did my History prelims today...it was okay..i guess... After school, went home with Nishaa and met Kumari under my block at 7pm. We walked to Nee Soon CC to have tuition. Reached home around 10 plus. Argh! Tomorrow is Physics and POA paper 2. Can i do it? Im more or less ready for POA..But Physics? SIGHS...

I miss those times i used to stay up late in the night watching movies with my dad. I remember always watching Alley Mcbeal with my dad. I miss those times i used to go out with my dad. Those times we used to go for jouy rides, those times i used to follow my dad around while he visits his friends, those times he used to tell me stories, those times we used to snuggle in bed and ''wrestle'', those times we used to have our mini fights, those kisses i never failed to give you, those times i used to get pissed with you, those times when everything around me left me in the dark, the little things you would say or do that would light it up, those times you always managed to make me smile, those times..u WERE my main source of motivation...DADDY...I LOVE YOU AND MISS YOU TERRIBLY....if only things were different..if only mummy and you didnt get that divorce..how wonderful would life be for me now...:'(.
Watching ''Alley Mcbeal'' act in ''Brothers and Sisters'', made me think of this...=(

A permanent scar in my heart would be that im away from you....

12:00 AM; unforgotten.Y

Sunday, September 09, 2007

Recorded by "Cutting Crew"
Album: "Broadcast" - 1986

I keep looking for something I can't get
Broken hearts lie all around me
And I don't see an easy way out of this
Her diary, it sits on the bedside table
The curtains are closed, the cat's in the cradle
Who would've thought that a boy like me could come to this

(Chorus)

Oh, I just died in your arms tonight
It must've been something you said,
I just died in your arms tonight
Oh, I just died in your arms tonight
It must've been some kind of kiss
I should've walked away, I should've walked away

Is there any just cause for feeling like this
On the surface I'm a name on a list
I try to be discreet, but then blow it again
I've lost and found, it's my final mistake
She's loving by proxy, no give and all take'
Cause I've been thrilled to fantasy one too many times

(Chorus)
It was a long hot night
She made it easy, she made it feel right
But now it's over, the moment is gone
I followed my hands, not my head,
I know I was wrong

(Chorus)

3:57 PM; unforgotten.Y

8 September 2007 - Saturday.
Had tuition in the morning. Slept in the afternoon. And followed mummy to a wedding in the night. It was at Foo Chow building. The wedding was okay luh. The only highlight was that this cocasion guy..took off his shirt on stage while playing this game. WAH! DAMN SHOIK la his body. TEEHEEE!

9 September 2007 -TODAY!
Went to church in the morning. Met cass and had breakfast. Then went for mass with Cass, Shannon and Matthew Benedict. After mass, sat with the three of them and Nicole and Rajiv in the canteen. Both Shannon and Matthew Ben kept making a big fuss about how curry puffs are sooo good. Haha Cass was upset or something and Matthew said '' Go get a curry puff. It will make u feel better.'' LOL! Then Shannon and Matthew Benedict and i walked home. Its a good thing we live so near each other. And i had tutition. Tuition with Kumari just ended.

Events to look forward to :
1. Harri's birthday
2. Cassandra's 16th birthday party
3. Christine's wedding although its next year
4. The last paper of the O lvels.
5. SHOPPING LIKE CRAZY after the O levels
6. The possibility of going to India at the end of the year
7. More outings with Kumari and her friends
8. Jacinta's and my anniversary
9. Mummy's birthday - 25 October
10. Sheila and Alex's arrival in Singapore.

YAYNESS!

3:43 PM; unforgotten.Y

7 September 2007

Its happening again! Im crying over Pradeep again. Melissa told me that they are not going on. Michelle told me the same cause she wanted to be friends. But Jeeviyan and Keeran said they are just that they want to keep it low profile. Life just sucks. If Jeeviyan knows about this, then wouldn’t the rest of the guys know this too? So im left in the dark again. Everyone knew the one thing I should know and I didn’t till now? FUCK! I cant stop crying. Crying and crying and crying. Its been like an hour and a half since I started crying. I want to stop. But I just cant! I thought I was over you..but now I find myself questioning myself again. Am I really? I hate the world! I hate everyone! I have never felt sooo depressed before. Have I been too nice that people are taking advantage of me? Maybe its time to change. The Christine you people know is slowly dying. The new Christine will reborn soon. And shes not gonna be nice anymore. Shes gonna be freaking mean! So watch it!

I just cant stop eating and shopping and bathing. I CANT STOP! I guess it’s a way to show how depressed and stressed up I am. SIGHS…..

Just now, I suddenly felt so stressed up and upset cause my sister was so mean to me that I went to the chapel to pray. I was the only one there. Thank god! I prayed and I felt better. I spent about 20 minutes in there. And I walked out of church feeling normal again. But now….im in another emotional breakdown. I need help. SERIOSULY! Ive even got thoughts on suicidal…sighs…

3:39 PM; unforgotten.Y

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

A piece of advise : Concentrate on your studies and make it your first priority. Because boys and looks and fashion will kill your time and make you a total loser!

10:52 PM; unforgotten.Y

5 days of the September holidays has passed and i havent really start studying yet. FUCK! Ive been going out or just sleeping the whole day away. SIGH! Tomorrow im gonna start studying if not...well, if not its myown pasat. Im gonna die when it comes to the sitting of the O level paper and when it comes to the results. IVE GOT TO EFFING WORK HARD NOW!

MY AIMS :
ENGLISH - A2
TAMIL 'B' SYLLABUS - DISTINCTION
POA - A1
MATHS - A1
COMBINED SCIENCE - A2
COMBINED HUMANITIES - A2
ART - B3
TOTAL POINTS FOR 6 SUBJECTS - 11

*Will i do it?*

10:45 PM; unforgotten.Y

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Yesterday, i went out with Kumari to the Army Open house in Jurong. We met her friends Harri, Bala and Renu. It was fun. But i was the only 16 year old. Everyone else was 20 years old. Hehe nothing wrong with that luh actually. First Kumari came to my house to give me tuition. Then we left and went to Vivocity. Met her sister, Amala, and her boyfriend there. Then Harri came. From there, we went to chinatown to buy Bala slippers and off we cabbed down to the Army Open house. We walked around. It was okay. A lil boring for me. BUT....A LOT of handsome guys. WHOOOOTS! Hehe. Then Bala, Kumari, Harri and i went to Causeway point. Met Renu there and we had dinner at Pasta Mania. Bala paid for everything! Then we went home.

Today, i woke up at 6am. Then i went back to sleep and woke up at 6.30am. And went back to sleep again and finally woke up at 6.45am. Hehe took a bath n met Nishaa. Then we went to school. On the way i bought Ya Kun Kaya toast for breakfast. We met Humairah at the interchange and took 859. Went to school for art. I had to finish up my coursework. I took pictures of the art work but i dont think i should put them up here. I doubt they will be okay with it. Sighs! Thats about it. See ya!

11:28 PM; unforgotten.Y

Saturday, September 01, 2007

Woah! Im exhausted...
Went for mass with Brenda and Cassandra. Then we went to North Point..we wanted to watch EVAN ALMIGHTY! But the movie only started at 9pm and mass ended at 7pm. We walked to North Point. Then we went to buy tickets. After that, Cass went to draw money and on the way, we met Jeramaire. Since we had SO MUCH time, we walked Jeramaire to the bus stop and waited till his bus came. We were laughing like crazy at the bus stop lah. Actually interchange. I was trying to describe the Blessed Sacrament church to Jeramaire but i didnt know how exactly. So this was what i said....the brown chruch thats going down and that has goats, chickens and sheeps. HAHA! Okay after he left, we ate at Long Johns and then went to watch the movie. The movie was nice lah. It ended around 10.40pm. Then Cass, Brend and i cam whored at the interchange. Hehex.. And as usual....i walked home.

Yesteday was the Teachers Day Celebrations in YTSS...was fun luh. My class performed on stage. We danced to the Crazy frog song. The one that goes ding ding! Our moves were quite funny but im sure Mr Teo liked it. =) I gave Mr Teo an orange flower and a card...more like a letter luh. Haha..When he took the flower from me, he screamed at the flower. I nearly had a heart attack. LOLS! Then my class took a class photo. Everything was nice la. The concert ended around 9 something. Early huh? Nishaa and i stayed in school till 11 plus. We were taking pictures with like EVERYONE! haha... Errm then we met Thiru and Humairah. Went back to Yishun with them. Then we ate at Long Johns and met Jacinta. Then Humairah and Nishaa went home to change cause they wanted to watch a movie. After eating, we met Suganthi and her boyfriend, Vicky. We went under 201 and talked and talked. Was fun and nice. Haha yups thats about it. Enjoy the pictures!